Sunday, May 1, 2011

29. Principles of self-esteem.

According to Nathaniel Branden (see his book "Six Pillars of Self-Esteem" 1994) the 6 pillars of self-esteem are

1) The practice of living consciously.

2) The practice of self-acceptance. 

3) The practice of self-responsibility.

4) The practice of self-assertiveness.

5) The practice of living purposefully. 

6) The practice of personal integrity.

Significant principles in this philosophy of self-esteem of Nathniel Branden are

1) No other individual or group of individuals has the power to determine how I will think and feel about myself.
2) I deserve to be treated courteously and with respect by everyone. If people treat me discourtesy or disrespectfully, it is a reflection on them, not on me.
3) At the most fundamental level I am for myself.
4) No one has the right to force on me ideas and values I do not accept, just as I do not have the right to force my ideas and values on others.
5) I am better served by holding my values consciously than unconsciously, and by examining them rather than holding them uncritically as not-to-be-questioned  "axioms".
6)I accept the reality of my problems, but I am not defined by them. My problems are not my essence. My dear, confusion, or mistakes are not my core
7) My self-esteem is more valuable than any short-term rewards for its betrayal
8) Values than nurture and support the individual's life and fulfilment on earth are superior to values that endanger or threaten them.
9) An individual human being belongs neither to family nor community nor church nor state nor the world. A human being is not  property.
10) We should not sacrifice self to others nor others to self; we should discard the idea of human sacrifice as a moral idea.
11) Relationships based on an exchange of values are superior to those based on the sacrifice of anyone to anyone.

According to Williams James in his Principles of Psychology, originally published in 1980, the self-esteem can be measured also as a ratio

Self-esteem=Success/Pretensions. It will be increased if either we decrease the denominator or increase the numerator.

From the point of view of the totality of our existence, the self-confidence and self-esteem has four levels, the levels of our existence. That is  Being, Thinking, Acting, Having. 

The lowest form of self-confidence comes from what we have
A bit higher form of self-confidence comes from what we do.
A higher form of self-confidence comes from what we think and feel.
And the highest form of self-confidence comes from what we are, and will

The overall coordination of the 4 levels is through the virtue of congruence

(By Morenay)

"We are, as souls of human beings, perceivers. We are an awareness. We are not objects and we have no solidity. We are boundless. The world of objects and solidity is a way for making our passage through our densities convenient. It is only a description that was created to help us. We do not forget that the description is only a description and thus, we have learned not to entrap the totality of ourselves in a vicious circle of physicality from which few rarely emerge in a lifetime."