Sunday, May 1, 2011

66. Dealing with failure and success.

During the journey towards a worthy goals it is almost impossible not to meet defeats , failures besides successes. I would not say  that the reason of the journey is to have failures and defeats and cross through the  hell. But better learn to deal with them, as from this depends in a major way the success of the journey itself. And of course the central here is the emotional impact that failures have. Know intellectually that it is almost impossible not to meet with adversities and failures  during the journey and "budget" in the "resources" for them, but do not expect them emotionally in a  fearful, or worrying way.
We should not let defeats  influence our self-esteem and image we have for ourselves. We are not our troubles and failures. "Losing a battle is not losing the war" (for those that like the metaphor of the war). We should try to keep an emotional distance from them. And mainly we should not let them influence our primary belief for the final successful achievement of the goal of the journey. We must tolerate the failures thought utilization of them. In other words we must try to extract from them how to improve ourselves, our prioritised values, our skills and knowledge, our resources and  references etc for a journey of better probabilities of a final success. This is the wheel  of administration either in a personal level or in business. Plan->communicate-->conduct--->review--->make corrections and re-plan again and so on.  Patience  courage, and perseverance are the keys. Some of the defeats may make us enhance the goal of the journey. This may be a real benefit in the event of the final success. Each failure gives us the  opportunity and the seed of an equal or greater success. The world is great. Almost for every difficulty we meet, there is somewhere in the world a possibility and the antidote of an equal or greater benefit. It is in our responsibility to find it, adopt our skills and desires, and go for it. It is also an opportunity of re-examining, values, priorities, weaknesses , strengths goals and tactics.

Nevertheless do not take it lightly and let your "demons" to take advantage of you, based on the above. It is obvious that we should try to avoid defeats and failures. And learning from successes  may be a better teacher than learning from failures. Successes too should be carefully analysed and teach us. After any important event we may want to stop , ponder and think: What did I do successfully? What would I do differently? 
A way to be sure that the failures do not repeat, at least due to the same causes, is to be careful about the reasons of each failure, and the improvements you made in your skills and methods. As yourself and your  methods improve, the failures should be less frequent, and never due to the same cause. Eventually the final success. Therefore the intermediate failures is also a tool to pursuit the constant and never ending improvement; personal and in the tools. So that every day in every way to become better and better. Better, better than bitter.
Remember that the final success created by rewarding, only the successful steps, is faster and enjoyed better, compared to the final success created by punishing the defeats as well. Finally we should not be seduced by our own success. We should remember that there were and will be failures too. Once we have attained our goal we should  know how to stop, and not go for more minor successes. It is wiser. It is better to enjoy the success of the major goal only and start thinking of the next major goal.

Of course peace of mind  and happiness comes also when we feel that we accomplish gradually our true goals. And there minor and major goals in life. We might say that our existence has no other goal than to exist. Or that we may have many different goals, according to the scale of relevance in our existence. But one of the most beautiful and meaningful goals in life is to develop more of our soul consciousness. So all other minor goals like social success, money, fame, knowledge , creativity etc are to serve this major goal of developing more of our soul consciousness

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